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Rank 2 - Vicious Wolf

Doing favours for mLTRs

Hello gentlemen,

some of you may have read my previous post on oneitis for my high-end mLTR, so you know, that I struggle with upholding the Alpha 2.0 principles in my relationship with her. I feel like its getting better but I do think there is still a large chance I will screw this up and not be able to maintain it long term. Doesnt matter, I take it as a learning experience.

What I find myself struggling with the most lately is doing favours for her. I have found out I most enjoy the model of one high-end mLTR, 1 regular FB and a few irregular FBs I see maybe once a month. So with my FBs it is mostly smooth sailing - I dont feel obligated doing anything for them and they dont ask, we just enjoy the sex.

With my mLTR this is different. She of course has demands, shit-tests or attempts at betaization if you will that are ridiculous (would you drive me in the middle of the day to a friend, I want to have a vegan dinner ready when I come to your place, etc. I think you can imagine) and I refuse those without a second thought. But then there are things I am on the fence and can't decide if it is a good idea to do them for her or not. For example, she is a model and she frequently flies abroad for photoshoots. Recently one of her flights was at 4:00 AM and she asked me if she could stay the night with me and if I would drive her there. But on the other hand she asked nicely, didnt expect me to do it and offered she would take a cab if I would refuse. I ultimately drove her to the airport after a night full of sex. But I am wondering, if it was the right decision in the Alpha 2.0 frame of the relationship.

What I would like to know your opinion on is this - how do you decide what kind of favours you do for your mLTRs? Where is the line between maintaining a relationship where I believe mutual favours should be part of the equation and supplicating behavior? 

I might be overthinking this (I usually do) but this stuff does not come naturally to me - I am on the difficult journey from the most hardcore beta nice guy you can imagine to Alpha 2.0. Lowest level to the highest and so I hope its normal to struggle and be unsure of myself from time to time. 

Thanks for your guidance,

John

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Replies

  • Rank 3 - Tenacious Bear

    Would she have done it for you?  If so no big deal.  I think it is important that when you do do a favor for a woman that you do not act as if you are doing it because you have to.  It is normal to want to help people you care about.  Besides, she didn't MAKE you.  

  • Rank 3 - Tenacious Bear

    My take is that what you did was fine in the all the circumstances that you describe. She is, after all, more than an FB. If I were you, I'd just not worry about it, but you could keep an eye on things if you want to – if the number of such requests increases or they become ever more burdensome to you if you carry them out, then you could re-think things, but as I say for now it seems fine. As Rocky noted, would she have done it for you? Also, might you not to a similar thing for someone who is simply a good friend or even a family member? The night full of sex just seems to me to be an added bonus.

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